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But What About Me?
I am a rule follower. A boring, compliant rule follower. And because of this, I can really identify with the older son sometimes. Here he is, working his butt off, doing everything that is “right” (in his mind anyway), and he doesn’t even get an “attaboy”. But his brother gets a huge party for wasting his dad’s money and basically being a derelict. I’d be ticked off, too. Doesn’t seem fair does it? He’s so mad, he refers to his brother as ” this son of yours”. He won’t even call him brother. Boy, is the older son missing out though. If he would just get over himself, stop the pity party, he could enjoy an even better party. His father is celebrating a new life; his son has returned. But the older son can’t get past how this “isn’t fair.” I can fall into this type of thinking too quickly I’m afraid. There are times when I just need to stop, adjust my attitude, and realize it isn’t always about me. I am already a part of God’s family. When God is doing amazing things in someone else’s life, that is reason enough to celebrate. If I get too caught up on how it all relates to me, I could miss out on a terrific celebration.
Great thoughts Ben! Something for us all to remember.
You put your finger on the pulse…the rational, but knee jerk reaction to unfairness is exactly that, “what about me?” And how understandable and tempting it is. to cry out from our hearts “it isn’t fair!” In reading your piece, two rather traumatic occasions (among many lesser ones) come to mind when I succumbed to such thinking in a moment of feeling “betrayed” by a loved one. At the time, the first one seemed like an incidential moment of weakness that I quickly got over, but looking back I can see the slippery slope that took me on an unnecessary detour because of my failure to get God’s perspective in time to avoid that. In the second one I was more prepared, and fared much better insofar as keeping God’s perspective–but it too has been desperately painful and difficult because the other person refused to come to the light and allow a true resolutin. In that case there has been a long period of what I term “walking in the twilight” wherein I have to consciously remember what our Lord told me, “I know, but I want you to love in return”. Thanks Ben…for your direct dealing with a situation and a temptation that plagues us all. Reading your take and processing this response is providing a much needed affirmation that indeed I am on the right track this time. Having said that, it is still too easy to be caught off guard in a situation which pops up for nowhere wherein we must cry out, “I believe, help my unbelief…”
Hey, as another boring rule follower, we rock!! But you are so right, we sometimes forget that we already have our reward, fellowship with the Father. We should be celebrating that every day instead of getting jealous over someone else’s celebration. There’s more than enough love to go around, thank God! Thanks for the reminder, Ben.
Thanks Ben.
Pride can stop us from seeing the big picture. I know I have been a victim of my pride myself.
I pray that I can continue to mature in humility.
P
Right on point, Ben. I don’t have anything else to add that I’ve not already said this week except that I am a ‘boring rule-follower’ too, so I also have struggled with falling into the older brother trap.
Older brother & rule follower here. It’s hard to understand the prodigal son wanting to leave, but it’s wonderful being able to share God’s grace and mercy with him as I am just as much need of those things as he is.
Thanks Mr. Ben. It really wasn’t until last year I think that I really thought beyond the prodigal son in this parable…when Alan asked us to consider the older son as you have today. Thanks for your words and encouragement today to really seek God’s eternal perspective…without it we really do (ironically) miss out on so much. I’m looking forward to Alan’s focusing on the other character in this story this Sunday – “The Way-Cool Dad”. Thanks again Bean.
#2 of my father, so younger brother to my older brother
#1 of my mother, so older brother to my younger brother and sister
That probably explains me being screwed up.
I keyed in on the sentence “All these years I **slaved** for you and never disobeyed one of your orders.” My emphasis on “slaved.”
So maybe he’s getting to some real, true feelings. When “…that son of yours…” (the less than human, thing without a name, that is in no way related to me) makes it home, he lets it all out:
He considered working for his dad slavery, and maybe he wished he had disobeyed. Is that too much conjecture? What do the scholars say? Is he just being emotional or do his words really mean he thought it was slavery? Too much conjecture on my part probably.