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A Complete Guide to Fatherhood
We have a rule in our house that goes something like this: No whining! Will and Russ produce some impressive dramas when things are not going their way. When they start the complaints, we point them to their room and tell them that they can come back and talk to us when they calm down. Most of the time this takes a few minutes, but every now and then they give us a special performance. The noises and actions that they produce in these excessive times of frustration are probably outlawed in many states. Jen would say their sounds mimic that of a recent Radiohead album, and that is not a compliment in her eyes. Moreover, they can keep it going for 15-30 minutes. When they set their minds to something, they give it everything they have.
On occasion I will listen in agony, wanting to run into their room and just put my arms around them and tell them it is OK. On the days when they throw down the foot-stomp or stick their head out the door and scream, “You just love _____ more than me!” my patience grows exceptionally thin. The end result, however, is always the same. Once they settle down, they tuck their chin down to their chest, creep down the steps and tell me “I am sorry Daddy. I am calm now”, and crawl into my arms.
I had always had a hard time grasping the part of the trinity referred to as God the Father. I never had a father around the home when I was growing up, so I found it hard to make those connections. But when God blessed me with Will and Russ five years ago, he opened that door for me. I read verses like Luke 15:20 with a totally different lens these days. The sins I have accumulated during my lifetime make a temper tantrum coming from an upstairs bedroom seem insignificant. I now have real life illustrations of how my Holy Father deals with these sins. When I tuck my own chin away, get down on my knees, and pray, He comes a running! Fortunately, His word has many more tips on fatherhood waiting for me.
The word/idea of repentance has been so abused and mistreated, that I think most americans feel condemned as soon as the word is used in a sentence. But there is no better way to describe it. Humble repentance is exactly where the prodigal son ended up when he hit rock bottom. When everything was stripped away, he was forced to face the reality of what he had done.
I agree with Brian, in that as fathers we must put our unruley children in a place that forces them to face what they have done and how they are acting. It is a painful, but extremely important part of life. To take the time to internally examine who we are. There is a flood of distractions in this world. And there are those who would like nothing more than for us to have a bad taste in our mouth about repentance. But repentance is the first step to reconciliation, and from there to redemption. We need but recognize where we are and turn back to God. Make the silent walk of shame down the hall to sti in Dad’s lap and say “I’m sorry”.
Great message this morning Brian. I have always heard that parents have a better appreciation for this scripture and you have given us a perfect anecdote to go with this idea. Thank God for always waiting on me to come running back to him, thank God for always taking care of me and providing for my needs.
I love the No Whining rule…might have to borrow that one myself one day.
There are many times in my life when I felt unworthy to be called a child of God. Times when I stomped my foot and told God what I wanted and when I wanted it. Thank you Lord for your patience of bearing with me. Of seeing me through those times lovingly. Thank you for reminding me of who is in charge and thank you that it’s not me. Thank you for not only removing my sins but also of removing the guilt. Thank you for throwing your arms around me and calling me yours.
Thanks Brian for helping us to see our Heavenly Father and His love.
This is a beautiful story of our Heavenly Father’s love for His children. In this story when the father’s son starts home we see that the father was out watching for his son. When the father sees his son coming, the father has compassion for his child, and runs to greet him with love and affection. This is an amazing part of the story, because under Mosaic Law the father had the perfect right to, at the very least, have his son beaten to near death, or had he preferred, the father could have had his son stoned to death. One can almost imagine the shock of surprise seen on the faces of those hearing Jesus tell this story. Instead of punishing the son, the father embraces him with love!
Friends, when we have left Him and wallowed in the pig-stye of our sins, our Heavenly Father is watching for us to return to Him. Patiently, lovingly, He is waiting for us to turn from our sin and come back to Him. He eagerly awaits, longing for us. When He sees us still a long way off He will have compassion on us and race to us embracing us with His love and forgiveness! If you are far from Him; won’t you turn and come back home today…right now!
Father I have sinned…
What a story. I have to tell the truth though, I struggle with this one. My Father has not been in my life since school days. I tried for many years to be a part of his world but he always rejected me. The why is what I struggle with. I now have a son and I try to be there for him in every way, sometimes to the point of smothering (that is when I get the “Oh Mom). At any rate, I struggle with a love that is so expansive that it covers anything that I could do or think and God still loves me. No matter what I do, he still loves me. I hope that I show that to my son but it is a struggle without having a physical example of “Fatherhood”. I am building on my faith every day to know that God loves me unconditionally and always wants me around. I know it but the believing is the hard part.
Candy Lee,
Thank you for sharing your struggle with us today. I am sorry that you were hurt and even to this day, feel the pain of your father’s rejection. I want to encourage you with these words. The choice your father made to hurt and reject you is his to own. You are not the cause of his rejection. You are a person of incredible value, and worth! God loves you perfectly, He has promised that He will never leave you or forsake you. Our God keeps His promises!
Today God is saying, “I LOVE YOU CANDY LEE!” He will keep on saying that over, and over, and over, today, tomorrow, and ten thousand tomorrows.
My dear sweet sister in Christ, remember this:
And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, 18may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, 19and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.
Ephesians 3:17b-19 NIV
I am praying this for you today.
I think the last part you wrote, “He comes a running” is the most important piece for us to take away from this story. No matter what we do, He comes a running.
I went to read March 10 and I got March 9. That was a God thing. I needed to read those verses and hear your story Brian. Thanks for the encouragement. I am so glad I had a dad I can say gave me a good image of God(as much as earthly dad can). This has been a foundation in my life. So to all the dads out there if you had a good or bad dad you can turn the tide for a whole new generation. Praise the Lord.
I still have four minutes before…make that three. Brian…great thoughts. You spelled it out so well. Thank you for making it come to life with your “5-year old illustrations” The fathers love and our response to it are vivid pictures in my head.
Jim, thank you for your words of wisdom and insight as well. You are definitely an encourager. Thanks again.